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Sunday, April 18, 2010; 12:34 PM
I just don't know what got into me just then. It just make me feel like crying and feel so hurt. Never mind it is just my fault in particular cause what you said is truth. Therefore it makes no sense for me to cry. I don't want to say more about the matter mentioned above. I am just saying that everything is fine, if it isn't, anything wrong just blame me that it. School starting tomorrow. I was thinking should I go to fix my laptop as the key c and the space bar sometime can not be pressed. Leave that aside first, one of my main concern is the purchasing of textbooks. I told my dad about the textbooks I needed to buy when school reopen but he choose to ignore me and do his own things. He did not even did answer any of the question related to money. He just throw the burden to me. I was now worrying about that. As we will only be able to purchase the textbook during first week of school, After that we can only photocopy from others which will be more expensive. You all might be wondering about the salary i will get from ITP right? However, sadly to say that I will be only receive the salary next month due to procedure it need to be approved. Sometime I know I shall not rely on miracle but I have to as I just cannot help it.
Sometime I just cannot pay within my might that I accept the offer. I just feel I own you lots and also a lot of things. I know you don't mean it but indirectly it really did. As you make it sound like i so shameless to accept all offer people offered. I don't really know what I am trying to say. I just feel so confused. I was weeping yesterday and today. Hopefully I won't weep the next day. The deep puddle of tears that are left where I cried just get deeper and deeper. Sometime it just make me think that I am drag into the depth of the pool and unable to breathe. Although people comment that I am a cheerful person and I keep smiling, always saying jokes or entertain people cause I don't like to be quiet, it is just an outer facade that hid me well. I can't possibly keep emo or show sadness to everyone right. You won't really want to get know to a person who is sad always right? I don't understand why I blog this post, is just that I think I am sad enough to blog my unhappiness so that it won't drag me further down the pool. I just cannot say it straight to face to my parents as I know they do really have their financial difficulties so I just can't force them to the cliff. In heavy debt and they are still borrowing money from others, of course no ones are lending them. Resulting me having maggie always or skip meals always. I can frankly say that my wallet and bank account total only have 2 dollars. Sometime I will blame them why they are so poor ler still give birth to so many child just because they want boys and I will blame why life are so unfair etc... But as time goes by, I realise that how society are. There is not guy and girl are equal this kinda of things. Guy are always better in girl in some sense. I am not that strong. I am not independent. I am not that good compare to my sister. I am not pretty compare to my sister. I am not......I am not..... I am not...
The Webmistress
Behind The Scenes
Profile
I am 18 this year.
Waiting for Santa- Presents to me on 1906!
Study in Singapore Polytechnic currently
I Like:
♥Family
♥Novel
♥Anime
♥Drama
♥Cartoon
♥Tibits
♥Dreaming
I Dislike:
♥Thunder
♥Darkness
♥The real world
♥Fake people
♥Emoness
♥Betrayers
♥Unfairness
♥Examination
♥Evil
Dear Santa, get these for me!
Cravings
Explore the World Happiness! New Shoes Confidence Score well Good GPA Fame, Beauty, Fortune Cheerful Wisdom Learning Japanese Meeting my "HIM" To be my real self Have all dream coming true
Princess
I want to be
Cinderella
Crystal shoes are laughing,
Birds are chipping.
Who is the one and only girl???
Answer reveals when ones wear the crystal shoes.
My heartbeat is pumping hardly yet the charming prince never notice.
Pray to the shooting star,
Please remember me!!
Till blood flow profusely out from the crystal shoes...
Enduring all pain hoping to touch you
Cutting my feet just to meet you.
I am Cinderella in disguise,
Believing in miracles will happen.
I am Cinderella in disguise,
Prepare for the ball and shine for you.
I am Cinderella in disguise,
Using lie just to win your precious smile.
I am staring at you always.
I am spining and dancing non-stop. Hoping you will remember the best of me
Until the clock strike 12 midnight
I am running against time
When it strike 12 midnight,
Magic disappears,how cruel the fact is.
Without the crystal shoes,
I am nothing.
Explore the World
♥Darwin Blog
February 2008
