Loner...Anti-social...Freak...
These words occupied my mind during the holiday.
I disliked holiday cause people will have things to do to keep themselves occupied whereas i have nothing to do but stay at home and read books that i borrow from the library.
Such a boring life,isn't it? I asked myself and i know the answer to it pretty well but there is nothing i could do. Reading fantasy book,hoping myself will be the female lead in it and lead a life like them. Ultimately, It is just impossible.
People will meet their fated one through life, which narrow down to people we met.
If you are working as an engineer, you meet engineer kinda of people. If you are working as a teacher,you most probably will meet another teacher. Thinking of that will lead to the harsh truth that fantasy will never happen. Is it possible that a very handsome guy will fall in love with an ugly girl or a normal girl?? I think it is impossible cause the fact is that when you are pretty,you will look for handsome guy so it is compatible. Otherwise betray yourself for the materialize things.
For this blog,posts have been written every now and then by me, however I know the harsh truth is that i am ALONE always. It might seem that i have many friend link, but in fact i link them, they never think of linking me cause i am nothing to them.
No one to go out with, speak to when i need, play with....No one....
Thinking of this, my heart cannot help but bleed. It is such a slow death that it is so much for me to bear. Wondering if it possible that miracle will happen in my life now for me to have confidence and hope in everything.
Holding a smile to my face and act cheerful but deep inside there is a pool of tears that i shred which allow me to be drown.
What i can do is nothing, but to write what i felt on blog and keep putting on a smile and live with it. I wanted to shout out loud that i felt so lonely and alone.
Pathetic isn't it??? I looked in the mirror and smiled.
Explore the World
♥Darwin Blog
February 2008
